Integrity

I was absolutely astonished today by a comment from someone while we were discussing external reviews. I've always been a proponent of honesty... definitely put your best foot forward, but part of embracing reality is acknowledging and identifying your weaknesses. The only way you can improve yourself or the world around you is by being honest in your assessment of yourself. Anyway, the comment went something like this [quoting from memory],

"You know the external reviewers use 'SS' style interrogation techniques during their site visits. Be careful what you say, especially when they ask questions like, 'How would you improve your program; we can be an advocate for you.' When they do that, don't really tell them what you think cause they could use that as negatives during the review."

I could not believe the subtle dishonesty and lack of integrity that this demonstrated. Why wouldn't you be honest? I know, I know, you're supposed to 'play the game' to get ahead. How can you sleep at night knowing you're lying to get ahead. By avoiding acknowledging and dealing with the serious issues that this particular program faced, you prevent yourself from moving forward. This is serious business. These are the precise reasons that this type of grant was not funded. You can't go around trying to pull the coat over people's eyes, especially in education, or charity... even if you're as slick (and devoid of integrity) as Madoff, karma or justice is going to come back and bite you in the ass.

This seems to be the course taken by people who get comfortable. I know when I get comfortable in the lab, I get lazy, and tend to try to make everything look rosier than it is... that's my downfall, my weakness. I have to fight hard to stay focused, continue to work hard, and strive to maintain my integrity. Cheating the boss, whether a granting agency, a PI, or program director, or anyone, tends to come to light eventually. Its amazing that these values aren't taken more seriously, especially in a profession, medicine/science, that is so based on finding the truth--following the evidence. I'm appalled... but I better get back to work before I fall into the same trap myself and begin cheating my boss of my time.